Keeping my head straight is mental !

October 10th 2026 is World Mental Health Day, but mental health still remains a taboo subject in many communities and social environments.

In many ways, as a society, we have made huge leaps forward in my lifetime. Although there are still pockets of bigotry and prejudice - homophobia, sexism, racism and other forms of ignorance have reduced (although certainly not eliminated). I am not convinced, however, that we have made the same progress in dealing with mental health.

I'm now in my 60s. I would estimate that 70% of my friends/ social group have experienced mental health issues. I would also estimate that 65% of them have not addressed those issue and they have suffered significantly as a result.

"I'm just feeling a bit down today, I'll be fine" is a mantra that I've heard from so many people. What utter nonsense! Not addressing your mental health does not make you tough and hard. It does not make you brave and courageous. It does not make you strong. It makes you weak and lacking in self-awareness. It makes you an ostrich with your head stuck firmly in the sand. It makes you a fool for failing to seek help when you desperately need it. If you had a broken leg, would you tough it out and not go to hospital? If your pipes were spewing out water, would you ignore it and just hope for the best - or would you call a plumber?

Just telling yourself "Oh I'm alright" is possibly the most ridiculous act of cowardice and stupidity known to mankind. I've seen people lose their marriages, their friends, their social circle and even their sanity, just because they didn't get help when they needed it. You're not alright - go get the help you need !

And it's not like there isn't a veritable avalanche of options available to help. Help is everywhere. Absolutely everywhere ! On my way into Hoddesdon town centre the other day - a journey of no more than 5 minutes, I saw 7 adverts or locations specifically dedicated to helping people with their mental health.

Rarely a week goes by when I do not think about dying. The combination of dealing with chronic pain (https://youtu.be/CMTUBl-f8f0) and the impact of leukaemia (https://youtu.be/36Qekdqc1ws) frequently leaves me at the bottom of a very dark pit. Everyone will recognise the "3am night terrors" when the world seems a very dark place. The pain can be overwhelming both by its intensity and in its permanency and hitting rock bottom is not a rare occurrence - for us all.

But when that happens, I have a defined process I go through. I know where to get help and I know how to use that help. The time may well come when taking the option of going to Switzerland for a peaceful and dignified assisted death may well come - perhaps it is almost inevitable. But until that time comes, I have no right to bring other people down or ruin the lives of those around me by being miserable all the time. I know how to get help.

The simple fact is this: Anyone will find that people will flock to their aid when they are in need. However, if you fail to do something about making yourself better but simply mooch around feeling sorry for yourself, telling everyone how much pain you are in or how miserable you are, friends and family will quickly lose patience with you. It's up to us to do something about it. I know several people that others deliberately avoid talking to because they know they will simply wallow in their own misery. And yet, it could so easily be resolved by the individual concerned seeking the help they need.

Mental health is a real thing and I'm guessing almost everybody reading this will have experienced mental health issues at some point, whether they recognise it or not. As a society we have to remove the stigma from mental health. We must make it a natural act for people who are struggling to get the help they so desperately need, rather than allowing society to frown on it or regard the patient as weak. We must start treating mental health issues the same way as we treat the common cold - it's something natural that we will all get from time to time, and there is a clear set of actions there to help us deal with it and get better.

So normalising and dealing with mental health issues is a two-step process. We each need to take responsibility for our own mental health and seek help when we need it - or when our loved ones tell us we need it. But as a society, we need to change the paradigm. We need to start seeing people who get help to deal with their mental health struggles as strong and mature people. We need to afford them respect and admiration instead of suspicion and derision.

It's not someone else's responsibility to do this. It's not the government's job, or the NHS's job or the GP's job.

It's our job. So let's be a better society. A decent society. A compassionate society.

It's up to us. Its up to me.

Stay Strong. Fight hard. Laugh lots.