Et in arcadia ego?

I'm in more of reflective mood this week, as opposed to last week's resigned frustration and anger.

There's so much ugliness in the world currently and that leaves me feeling despair for the future. Depressingly, we still have people taking sides over the conflict in the middle east, pretending that somehow one side is less guilty of human atrocities than the other, depending on where their political bigotries lie. They claim to want peace, but really they just want to indulge their own prejudice.

Every day, there are posts of sickening political bigotry, where people freely and without challenge, berate people they have never met. But because they are demonising the rich, or immigrants, or people of colour, the bigots feel they are free to belittle and berate innocents.

The appalling situation in Ukraine continues unabated with no prospect of peace in sight and a world that seems to have turned its back. It's funny how those who are so noisy about the situation in Palestine are so quiet about Ukraine. Hypocrisy reigns supreme.

I could go on, but you get the picture. There is so much darkness in the world and it is easy to get pulled down by it all.

So I have been pushing myself to find the positives - to search for the sunshine in the darkness.

For example - I rejoice in the opportunity to learn new things. I recently discovered that a golfing buddy of mine has a business that sells fractional ownership in art. Now - we're all familiar with the concept of owning shares in companies (anyone who has a private pension is de facto a shareholder because that's where your pension is invested), but who knew you could do the same with art? What a great idea! I love innovation like that. He's a lovely guy and I hope he is massively successful.

The beautiful daughter of one of my closest and dearest friends got married last week. As a young girl, barely into her teens, she always had this quiet confidence about her. She was always focussed and determined. Like her bother, she was always charming, engaging and fun to be around, and she has blossomed into the most wonderful woman. Her Dad is one of the most kind, thoughtful people you could ever wish to meet, so clearly the apple did not fall too far from the tree. I couldn't be happier for her and I hope she and her husband have many years of joy and happiness together. But it brought me so much joy to see how happy she was and I'm not too proud to admit that the photos brought a tear or two.

Two guys I am also incredibly proud and honoured to call good friends have recently become Captain and Vice Captain at our golf club. There is an out of date image to which some people cling (usually as a result of their innate political bigotry) of a golf club being something of an elite snobbery-fest. But the reality is the complete opposite. You couldn't find a more egalitarian environment. Nobody cares who you are, what you do or how much money you have. If you're a good bloke, you'll fit right in. Like so many before them, the incoming Captain and Vice Captain are men of integrity, decency, honour and fun. They will both do a great job, and that makes me happy.

In short, I've learned to take pleasure from the success and happiness of others. One can call it empathy, one can call it living vicariously in the joy of other people's lives, one can call it whatever one likes. But does it really matter? Other people are happy and being successful. That makes me happy. I don't need to explain it or apologise for it.

"Et in arcadia ego" in my context here, is the title of the first epoch in Brideshead Revisited. It refers to the fact that even in the height of joy and happiness, danger and evil also lurk. There are also a number of classical paintings with the same title and they all largely conform to the theme that even in paradise, evil and death are present.

But I choose to turn it around. When I see such ugliness and bigotry in the world, I purposefully go seeking for joy and happiness. I actively make myself focus on those things that deserve to be enjoyed or celebrated, whether it is someone coming up with an innovative and exciting investment opportunity, a much loved friend getting married, or an equally well loved friend becoming Club Captain/ Vice Captain.

One can find joy in the happiness of others.

Even in the depth of darkness, there is always some light. We just need to work a little harder to find it sometimes.

If you're reading this, whoever you are, I send you my love and best wishes. May you find happiness and peace in all things.